We Are All Bullies (Part 2)

(Image Courtesy: CLICK HERE.)

The other day after I posted my We Are All Bullies post, I listened to an intriguing call on Dr. Laura.
She was talking to a husband of  22 years who was told for the first time that her spouse was sexually abused by a male sibling.  He was upset and felt cheated of a loving wife.  He struggled with her  intimacy issues for 22 years and then was expected to just continue this one sided marriage.

Dr. Laura then said society has maintained the sacredness of the victim.  The victim is not held accountable for their own behavior and end up harming most of their relationships.

It's honorable to help a victim get out of victim-hood.  It is terrible to be so overly sympathetic that the victim can become a moody, self-centered, annoying person who takes for granted the nice people in their lives.

So, when you dwell, you are a living hell.

Criticize me if you want, but you've experienced this same type of person in your life.

Megyn Kelly's Story and How Bullies Create Bullies

We're All Bullies. Some of us just show better restraint.

(Photo: Amazon)

I  listened to Glenn Beck interview Megyn Kelly about her new book, Settle for More. She mentioned how she was deeply hurt by the bullying she experienced in high school. I believe many of us can look back on our school days with a “love-hate” gut wrenching feeling. Some parts of high school were memorable, but other events were horrible. Megyn Kelly said it took her about twenty years to let go of the bullying memories which were affecting her outlook on life. And the sad part is that is sticks with us longer than we'd like to admit.

We always hate the bully and feel sorry for the victims.

However, we must look at the bullying issue with real honesty because the victim turns into the bully, as well.

The reality is we are all bullies. 

I look back painfully at times in my twenties when I was the mean girl.  And after looking back at all the times I was picked on by other kids from grade school through college, I am still shocked that I repeated the behavior later on.  I had a rotten attitude at different jobs when I perceived favoritism and unfair treatment.  I was often angry when I was not recognized for my hard work and dedication.  Even though I earned raises, I disliked the slow climb up the ladder.  So, I took it out on my coworkers, and sometimes my supervisors. If crap was being dished out, I slammed it right back.  

Luckily, I realized my immature behavior and decided taking things personally was not part of any job description. What I did was not productive and showed a vengeful angry side of me I am now ashamed to admit. 

The cycle of bullying goes on.  Remember, we are all responsible.  I could have shown more restraint.  At the time I didn't want to. 

Update:  Check out my part 2 - how Bullies Become Bullies.  Read here. 

Tony Robbins Illustrates the Real Job of Teachers

The student isn't the one who should study, it is the teacher who should. 

When a student doesn't crave....we are a hurting society. 

School is around the corner and everyone is getting ready for the structured life that comes with the change of season.  Apple picking and enjoying the vegetables of the later part of the harvest are getting us in the mood for our favorite comfort foods.  Cooler nights are nice, too.

Let' get back to the memories of school.  I am absolutely angered and disappointed in the condition of our educational system today now that I am a parent.  As I went through school I believed it was good.  I wanted to learn and enjoyed most of my subjects.  The subjects that were presented to me were unexciting but gave me a baseline.  The professions I actually pursued in life were not presented to me in high school, but I had a decent start so I could guide myself as an adult.

But the school system decides for you what is necessary to learn and as an older adult, I hate that idea.  It is dangerous. I have a child now who is subjected to a very narrow point of view. Part of it is practical.  You can't learn the history of the world adequately in twelve years.  It is condensed with a lot of bias thrown in.  If you notice today's history books are watered down and sprinkled with a moralistic view that hate and racism must be conquered.  History is what it is and  history should be just facts.  We can't change the past, and we should not tailor our personal opinions to fit our own dramas.

Discussion is fine, but opinions should not be graded.  When it comes time for an examination of the facts, opinion should not impact your grade.  Sure I hate war.  But a lot of war happened. A child should not hear the drivel of adults' emotions regarding who killed who and who started what wars because the facts become twisted over time.  Emotional baggage is not a good way to educate. Books have agendas and resorting to one book is not a good idea.

Science now is full of opinion.  The scientific method cannot be tried on everything.  Theories are still theories and should not be passed off as fact.  I do not agree with certain aspects of nutrition as it is taught in grade school. And the history of vaccines is not completely taught.  Bias looms everywhere.  Climate change is now in children's textbooks.  Again, one sided.

Math has been horribly taught.  Just look at the "eye-vomit" of today's common core workbooks. There is no way a child can focus.

The reading program is pure disappointment.

When we try to reinvent the wheel every decade or so, children are harmed.  When we narrow what is taught because we are so pressed for time to include standardized testing, children are harmed. Childhood is very short, we shouldn't waste it on what a government pushes on us as standard.

And now that we no longer have a common morality the schools are making a common core version of how we should treat each other.  I truly see racism growing as we look too much at our differences.  We are not really all that different.  Why are we exploiting each other in the name of diversity?

No one looks back on school with memories of their standardized tests or how they were graded.  Back then we were so busy trying to fluff up our transcripts and we now look back  at our schooling much differently.

We are often shocked that we survived.

Tests don't matter anymore.  And tests should not matter much at all.  The most important things that change our lives for the better do not come from a state mandated curriculum.  Our teachers share their lives with us and introduce us to the excitement of living.  That's what counts.

Tony Robbins revealed a personal life changer for him in his documentary I am Not Your Guru.  He recalled one teacher who pointed him in an individualized direction.  This teacher recognized the talent in Tony Robbins and told him how to go out in the world and cultivate it.  It did not come from a state mandated textbook or test.

If that still happens in school, I am grateful, but we need to help our teachers feel free to do that.

If you've ever taken private music lessons, you will understand what I am trying to convey.  A private teacher, tutor, or sports coach knows how to reach a student by really studying him or her.  So it's not the child who should study, it is the instructor. The teacher draws out the child's talent.  The child is not to be molded to "our way."

A talented teacher takes a subject and presents it in a way so the student craves more, not to pass a test not to get it done and out of the way to plaster on a transcript.

If a student doesn't crave more, we are a hurting society.

You can hear Tony Robbins' personal story on the documentary.  If you want to hear which teacher in his life made a lasting impact go to the one hour and 39 minute mark.  (Warning: profanity is heard at different parts of the film.)

Volunteerism Part 2: A Little Advice to Find & Keep Talent

Last week I wrote about volunteering and how important it is to the community.  I noted how a school car wash had only 5 adults doing the work.  With a  good group of participants most people can find themselves in a position that utilizes their talents, or they learn new skills as the needs are presented. But there is always the consistent problem of low volunteer turnout.  

Because of this, there is another certain predicament during which volunteers cannot leave.  Imagine that.  There are a few people I've spoken to on various boards who are unable to resign because they can't find new people to take a turn.

People do want  a change of pace and desire to step down, especially if they have been involved with a non-profit for years, even decades.  It can be simple at times, for example, when your child ages out of a group, you can hand the baton to the parents with younger kids. Selling your home and moving is also an option.  (Kidding.)

But getting back to the issue of recruiting enough volunteers can be a tricky one.

In my own experience, I will refrain from joining a group if people do not ask for help.  If they look as if they have it all under control, why should I bother?  Some people are just control freaks and chase away the meeker ones who could be loyal and hard working.  Have you ever sat on a board and couldn't get a word in edgewise? Even with Robert's Rules of Fairness?

Does any of this sound familiar?

How do you get more folks to join your cause?

1- Invite them.  A personal request, face to face.  A generic announcement in the newspaper or church gathering isn't always going to work.  Make the request heartfelt.  Talk about why you are involved.  Your story becomes their story. Relevant experiences that are shared are moving and meaningful.

2- Give people time options so they can take turns or shifts.  Don't make people feel bad if they have to limit their time for other commitments.

3- Give current volunteers different jobs so they can get a taste of all the needs/tasks.  No one wants to be the dish washer at every covered dish supper. Accountants don't always want to be the treasurer.  Maybe they'd like to use their underutilized people skills and provide companionship or greet the public. Don't assume someone likes the same job.  While some do, you won't know unless you ask.

4- Stop being a control freak.  Receive new ideas and be willing to talk about them.  Things tried in the past may not work, but let people know why and discuss it anyway. Control freaks chase away a lot of good help.  If you happen to be the control freak who is doing most of the work, you are not trusting others, and you are a poor trainer.  Letting people know how do perform certain tasks in a teaching style of communication rather than a critical style will be the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

5- Shy people: speak up so the control freaks don't make you crazy.  Do it nicely, of course.  Control freaks seem to need a lot of building up. It's hidden under all their makeshift armour  they've layered up over years of perceived failure or rejection.  You are probably shy because it's your opinion that it's not worth the trouble to speak up.  But speak up anyway.  Be assertive.  Be brave and discover the pleasures of your new experiences in a worthwhile volunteering endeavor.

6- If you ask businesses for help/donations, gee whiz, be  loyal patrons of their businesses.  Business owners enjoy gushing over familiar faces.  But a stranger who walks in with a charity request is not often received well, because it happens constantly.  And DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT send a marketing person in or make a cold call.  Professional marketers are a big turn off.  The actual volunteers who are doing it for free should be making the requests.   One more thing: Give business owners a heads up before you need the money.  Don't send in someone in the next five minutes to pick up a check.  That is just rude.  Give them a week at least.  You have a budget, and they have a budget.  Paying the employees by Friday is a priority over your fundraiser.

7- Volunteers generally help each other out, build friendships that go beyond the volunteer experience, and thank each other often.  Do unto others as you would have done unto you.

The truth is, people with big hearts really desire to help out. While the needs are high, I believe local communities have plenty of people available to help out.  These unknown helpers may feel they don't have the time, talent, or awareness of what is needed around them. And it's just painful to step out of the old comfort zone.

Comfort Zones Be Gone!

Keep working on it.  After all, it is work, but it can be inspiring work.

The Currency of Volunteerism, the Worthlessness of a Filled Resume, and Our Fantasy Government

I was in line at a car wash fund raiser last weekend.  One of our local parochial schools was trying to raise money for its kids.  As I waited I looked around at the volunteers.  Four adults were working hard soaping and shining the cars.  One adult was busy watching the younger kids who were holding signs, making sure they were not getting too close to the street.

 Five adults running a car wash, to me is a low participation.  I know how many students attend the school.  There are more than a few families.  I know it's summer.  People may be away on vacation.  But at times I'm sure people will say to themselves, "Someone else will do it."  I, too, am a parent who is recently struggling with doing my share for my child's school because of my work schedule.

Volunteers fill such an important gap in our society.  People helping people for free, with their free time is probably the best commodity that keeps us afloat.  Stay at home moms are critical.  They are a true gift.  Paid child care is helpful at times but they  will never replace  moms and dads.

Our nation started out with an all volunteer militia.  Congress members were paid per diem until 1815. I won't go into a long history lesson, but we go so much farther with good deeds when there is no money value placed on them. We know we will get nothing in our bank account, but we will have a thriving, happy community.

Schools don't run cheaply.  Payroll and insurance are the largest bills next to building repairs and utilities.  We haven't even mentioned children yet and how they will be educated.  Odd, isn't it?

Churches feed the poor and save souls, yet parking lots and AC units need much repair.

Disaster relief agencies need money.  The hands on work is provided by volunteers, but the equipment must be paid for.

Volunteer fire fighters donate their bodies every time they fight a fire, but the trucks, hoses, and oxygen tanks need to be paid for.

Even with health insurance, families need to fund raise for the out of pocket costs, traveling, etc when someone has a chronic illness.

So, the car washes, pasta dinners, raffles book sales, garage sales need volunteers to keep our communities together.  It's this giving spirit that wins.  We feel connected and we meet people's needs.

Now, enter the recent conventions that just ended. Thank goodness.  The Republican and Democrat nominees made so many promises to us, for our votes, of course.  It's such a long laundry list of wants.  To me, it's unbelievable how we have so many unmet needs.  These unmet needs have been unmet for generations.  Do you see the poor logic here?  When did we become so helpless?

Okay, I understand, we are taxed in crazy ways for things we don't need.  The waste is huge.  The majority of it is unconstitutional.  (Just to remind you.) We pay  federal taxes and a great deal of the funds do not come back to our local communities.  Much of this happens with our state taxes, as well.

Can we step up our volunteerism to show we are self-sufficient?  Can we tell the government we don't want all the trappings of their promises of grants and federal aid?  Can we use our money the way we see fit?  That's the ultimate question.

 I remember a time in my life when college was my priority.  I had at least two part time jobs, if not three at times.  I told myself I was sacrificing for my future.   I was so engrossed in my future, I didn't volunteer for anything.  I was working and studying all the time. Well, now my future is here and I ask myself, was it worth it?  I need to make up for lost time, because I was not a part of my community.  I was an invisible citizen, keeping to myself and doing nothing for others.

At my age now, I see filling a resume is just robbing you of your self.  Jobs come and go.  You are no longer recognized for your loyalty.  Experience and education are necessary, but surely overrated.  How many students commit suicide due to sheer exhaustion and meeting frilly expectations of society or demanding parents?

The volunteer spirit has made our communities great and we must always be charitable with our free time. I will not deny that life has challenges. Our time is constrained by jobs and family responsibility.  But it is necessary to volunteer and help our closest neighbors, as well as teach this to our children by example and involving them.  We need to provide comfort to each other while we are on this side of eternity.

Being Open to God---I Mean Really Being Open

A nun from the St. Elizabeth Missions, Franciscan Associates came to Mass to speak.  In a nutshell she said she grew up thinking poverty meant lack of material things, now she knows it now as a lack of opportunity.   Here's their Link.

She worked in hospitals and education during her more than 50 years of mission work.  She brought up three examples of people she worked with who were able to benefit from the Franciscan Sister's schools and go on to pursue fulfilling careers.

In today's Gospel, the Samaritan was the only person to stop and help someone beaten up in the road.  The Samaritan felt compassion for the man and to care for him.  The injured man could not care for himself at that time.  It is a good reminder  that we have the ability to give to others who need it and it can be a very transforming for the people who accept help.

I reflected on the times when we are the Samaritan.  There are also times when we are the beaten one laying helpless in the street too injured to move.

Sometimes the person who needs help also needs to find the humility to ask for help or to allow others to provide help.  We are in a proud society and many people feel they are failing if they show their vulnerability and let others know they have a need. It's not easy to ask for help.  And it is a gift to help others who cannot return the favor.  I saw this during my time working at a nursing home.  People needed 24 hour care.  Those who were aware of their weaknesses felt bad as if they were a burden to others.  It was difficult for them to let that wall down and just receive the attention and care.

The nun also spoke of young people who were so devoted to their education that they worked very hard balancing the needs of their family and allowing for time to study.  The Franciscans made it possible for them to have a school and access scholarships for advanced education.  They didn't consider their lack of electricity or running water as a hindrance.  In fact, they were not conscious of the fact they lacked these conveniences  We look in from our own view point and see this as a detriment.  But they appreciated everything.

Afterward I walked up to her and thanked her for coming to our church to speak.  She was very friendly, of course, and really drew me out into a moving conversation.  All I wanted to do was speak to her momentarily and be on my way.  After all she was busy spreading the word about the work of the Franciscan Sisters.  I did not want to be a bother.

Then, she asked me about my occupation and I told her I am a chiropractor.  Now, she melted my heart saying how important it was to help alleviate people's pain.  I said I hoped I was helping them.  In my mind I was reliving the times I didn't feel people were making progress.  I think about them often.  I told Sister I am answering a call from God.  I'm not sure at all what I am doing but I will follow his command and stick with it.  She said that's what we do.  We keep on going for God.

It has been the rare moment when I tell others God told me to become a chiropractor. I usually tell people I want to share the benefits of chiropractic because I found the experience to be liberating and everyone should have that as well.   But, I clearly heard God's voice say I was to become a chiropractor.  I feel like Moses in the desert.  Some days (many) I have no confidence, but then again, why should I have any confidence at all?  I am not supposed to be above God.

This kind lady made me stop and think for a moment and I decided I don't have to figure it all out today, or tomorrow.
Even Mother Angelica said:
Whatever you feel needs to be done, even though you're shaking in your boots, you're scared to death – take the first step forward. The grace comes with that one step and you get the grace as you step. Being afraid is not a problem; it's doing nothing when you're afraid."

Here's another Mother Angelica gem:  Get back to the basics, your prayers.

Thank you, ladies for your words. 

Cars, Phones, Coffee, and Sneakers

(Source: bestwalkingfeet.com)
I took a walk this morning.  It's a nice quiet time to be alone and enjoy my thoughts.  It's a good outlet compared to my crammed, stressful thoughts during the work day.  So I walk and think.

I came up to an intersection at the same time a car slowly approached.  Being the nice person that I am I hate to make other people slow down and at times I walk behind a car.  Pedestrians have the right of way and I know you cannot trust that.  How many people get hit downtown when drivers should be driving less than 30 m.p.h. because there are so many parked cars and walkers?

As I walked behind the car that had now stopped for the stop sign, my thought at that moment was, "What a nice color.  Some kind of dark red blended with maroon."  The driver was a young man.  I don't know how young because I assume everyone is just very young compared to me.  My next internalized thought was, "Wow, I had a crappy rust bucket for a car when I was young."  And I reveled in my old memory of a $300 used Chevette that allowed me to complete my student teaching during my senior year of college.

The guy shouts at me:  "I'm sorry!"  He really yelled.  By this time I was behind his car heading for the sidewalk on the other side of the street.  Why would he apologize?  His window on the passenger side was closed so I made a hand motion that I wasn't concerned.

He rolled down the window and repeated his apology again with an explanation.  "I am so sorry.  I was texting.  I shouldn't text."

I didn't think of it.  I didn't see his head down.  I really wasn't looking at him.  I was looking at my walking path and making the decision to walk behind the car so he didn't have to wait for me to cross. There we were, two people in our own worlds coming to an intersection.

He apologized.  I said, "Don't worry, I was walking behind your car anyway."  He said, "Have a happy fourth."

So, there you go.  He was feeling bad for texting as he approached a stop sign.  I really had no intention of crossing the street in front of him whether he was texting or not.  I was defensive walking.  We learned in driver's ed about defensive driving.  We just happen to go through life with defensive living. And if we are pleasant about it, we end up pleasantly surprised at times.

I continued on with my walk and was approaching the Dunkin Donuts.  A car was left running and I assumed the driver was inside getting his coffee fix.  I live in a small city where people feel comfortable enough to leave their car idle and rush into a store. It's not legal in NY, but some people do it anyway.  He must have continued on with his day, in his car.  There were no police cars when I came back.

I then walked past a house where two men were outside looking tense.  One man said, "She must have my keys and took it."  The other man was using a cell phone.  Again, a cell phone and a car.

Before my walk was over I crossed paths with a man leaving a convenient store.  He had an energy drink in his hand.  He looked happy to have just purchased a cold soft drink since he appeared to be walking rather than driving and a walk can make you thirsty.

My last part of the walk takes me through a strip mall near my house.  One of the businesses is a gym. Work out music could be heard since the door was propped open.  Gym members were jogging past me as I headed down my street.  No running for me today.  I was happy to get two hill climbs on my walking route.

Have a great day.

Teach Teens to Understand Pain

Heroin

(Source: www.teendrugsrehab.com)
Kids in sports?  Injuries in sports addiction to opiates?   Yikes.
(Source: CDC, https://www.drugabuse.gov/publications/drugfacts/prescription-over-counter-medications)

That's the latest on young people who become addicted to opiates.  Before they go begging for the street stuff, it all starts in the medical offices.

Teenagers who play sports get hurt.  It happens.  It is a given.  Sports medicine is a big niche now.  Colleges are giving out scholarships based on sports performance.  It's an exciting time for a kid.  And also full of pressure.

If you read the news reports, teenagers are given pretty strong pain meds to help them get through an injury.  Just one taste is all it takes.  

The brain is delicate for all of us. We should be respecting our brains.  But for children, the brain is in constant development up to age 25.  The brain is still immature developmentally for quite a long time.  The wiring is still primitive you could say.

Look at very young children.  They  want want want all day long.  They need parents to keep their desires in check.  A child that doesn't know how to share needs to learn by having toys taken away and given to another child.  A child that only wants cookies needs to not have cookies.

When it comes to children and pain, we don't want them to hurt.  Most children are lucky enough to get to adolescence without major diseases or injuries.  They don't know what serious pain feels like.  When they do experience pain, they need to be reassured that it is a normal part of the healing process and they need to patiently wait it out.

Caution here.  I did say "normal" pain.  The kind that is not ominous.  It's not cancer or a stoke.  But a sprained ankle does hurt, so does wisdom teeth surgery and conservative precautions can be taken while the body mends itself.

The prescription option for teenagers should not be necessary.  Basically we need to teach our children to handle pain.  There is no quick fix.  We need to teach our children to live in a tough world.

It's been a hard lesson for some.  Young people have died because their brains were exposed to a strong addictive chemical and they just couldn't get enough.  Cherish the brain.

When Did Sports Become More Important than Your Immortal Soul?

Does anyone see why I find this image to the left offensive?

Do we have to strive for college sports scholarships starting in 3rd grade?

Just asking?

Are we so over-scheduled that we can't make it to Mass on Sundays or Saturday Vigil?

Who thought it was a good idea to play and practice sports on Sunday morning?

Can't parents just say no and put a limit on kids' activities?

Since when did the rush of adrenaline on the field or screaming in the stands become more profound than bowing to our King of the Universe in front of his altar?

When did the body and blood of Christ become a dusty, relic of a concept when it is actually His promise and command?

Don't Be a Burden but Be a Prudent Judge: The Tough Love of Jesus

With the current debates as the general election of 2016 looms closer, the messages are old and tiring.  I find it very useless to hear the constipated arguments of the poor getting poorer and the rich getting richer.  It's such a meaningless statement yet powerfully incites sinfulness in all who proclaim it.

Someone out there with an agenda, (a very highly self-serving agenda) has decided what is the definition of poor and rich.  So, now we go down a long complicated road of complaining and coveting.  

Corporations are just not taxed enough. What you buy is not taxed enough. Workers are not paid enough. Where is all this magic money going to come from?

Are you fed up with it as I am? Why do we promote anger and distrust of each other?  If you're not a part of my political party you are ill informed, maybe even blind. Yes, both side are full of their own delusions.

I like the term “covet” because it sounds like an outdated word, but it is very relevant throughout these discussions. Because if you're not “giving til it hurts,” you are selfish. And if you are feeling deprived you should rightfully take from someone else who makes “obscene profit.” There we go again deciding that someone makes too much money. This means it's perfectly okay to be jealous of your neighbor and harbor feelings of resentment.

God really pinpointed our sinful nature. He didn't just throw in that commandment about coveting for no reason. "Thou shalt not steal" is an awesome commandment, but God knew we needed to recognize how we likely nurture the desire to steal through coveting.

Let's take a look at what creates coveting? Too much idle time to obsess about other people probably creates a covetous nature. Also, a foolish, careless attitude snowballs into bad outcomes that do not happen overnight. Perhaps being spoiled as a child, too?

While we are taught to bear one another's burdens, it has been conveniently left out of modern bible talk that we should not purposely become a burden to others. Yikes. How did I get to be so uncaring? Didn't Jesus teach us about “tough love?”

Take the book of Matthew, Chapter 25. The parable of the foolish virgins shows how we should not purposely become a burden to others and expect to be taken care of. The foolish virgins did not plan ahead and take extra oil for their lamps. The wise virgins took along their own extra oil because they could not predict when the bridegroom would arrive.
What were the foolish virgins thinking? Did they think the bridegroom couldn't possibly take very long to appear? Patience is a virtue, too.


And next, the foolish virgins seemed to expect the wise virgins to fix it for them. This was an important time to judge the situation and be prudent. I know we are told in modern bible talk that we should virtually judge nothing anymore. But these wise virgins knew they did not have enough oil if they gave it up. It's like a recipe for cake. If you only have half the eggs and sugar and proceed anyway, it's not going to be cake.

Now the foolish virgins were coveting. “We want some of your oil.” Their unspoken words could have been saying, “We know you'll share because it's the nice thing to do. You have more than enough ( AKA: more than you need, obscene profits).”

The wise virgins suggested the foolish virgins go to the nearest merchant and buy more oil. And while they went away from door, they missed the bridegroom's arrival and were locked out of the Kingdom of Heaven.

Thou shall not steal also comes to mind. A thief can try to connive a kind person who wants to be helpful. It's the oldest trick in the book. Lazy people prey on loving people hoping to lie to get something they want. “I will pay you back. I'll never do it again. I've learned my lesson, honey. No more gambling, drinking, cheating, etc. I'm just lucky to have you so I can take this shortcut and not be required to do something for myself.”

Jesus said:
Therefore, stay awake,* for you know neither the day nor the hour.

In the next parable in Matthew, Chapter 25, a servant who did nothing with his master's talents was thrown out into the darkness where he could wail and grind his teeth. 

 And Jesus himself said:
For to everyone who has, more will be given and he will grow rich; but from the one who has not, even what he has will be taken away.

Our own master, Jesus, gives each one of us talents and he hates to see us waste them.

I cannot predict how the election will turn out. I have no idea if the new president will inspire the country to strive for holiness to serve God rather than man. We will be waiting to see what kind of bills will be rolled out by the Congress.


We owe it to ourselves, each other, and God, to not make a mess of things here on earth. We should keep our “sin meters” well primed so we can correct our bad decisions before they blow up into huge problems that divide the country.


Jesus also said in Matthew Chapter 25:
 ‘Well done, my good and faithful servant. Since you were faithful in small matters, I will give you great responsibilities. Come, share your master’s joy.’


We shouldn't look down on ourselves as helpless and blame others in politics. We shouldn't argue which party is more evil. We need to take care of ourselves and not be a burden to others. We need to stop our sinful foolishness and trust that God didn't waste his time creating us. While evil does exist, we must not get sucked into evil with smooth talking arguments that lead us into resentment, jealousy, and coveting.

A Very Sick Game: Why Sick People Don't Stand Up for Themselves

Maybe I should call my blog, "Lisa's Rant."  Here it comes.  Hold on to your hat.

The politicians are at it again. Not only are they telling you how awful our country is, they want you to feel helpless.

I was listening to a speech today about poor people not affording their medicine while the pharmaceutical companies are making billions in profits.

Time for me to step in here with a question to turn the tables.  While the people in the audience were making sounds of shock to demonstrate their disgust, I have to ask,  why are you spending any money on drugs at all?  They are poisons given out in small doses which makes it legal in some illogical way.

Let's forget all about the money and ask the public, "Haven't you figured out by now, the drug madness has not made you healthy?"

In less than two sentences later, this politician said the USA spends more on health care than any other country.  Let that sink in.  We pay more than any other country because we allow the health insurance industry and pharmaceutical industry to push us around.

But, certain people created this legalized bullying:  the elected officials.

Oh, that hurts, because us buffoons have reelected these kooks, I mean crooks, over and over again.

If you are taking medicines and not feeling any better, have you ever asked, is there something else out there?  We are a sick nation and sick people don't stand up for themselves very well.

Sad.

How did we get sucked into the failures of the drug merry-go-round?  We listened and complied without asking any questions.  Now, ask the people who died from properly prescribed drug use what they think?  Ask the people who are dealing with long drawn out class action court cases?  Ask the people who were harmed by drugs that were later removed from the market?

I watched my Grandma take piles of drugs for as long as I  knew her.  She was in pain.  She was miserable.  She lived in fear because her health continued to fail.  Not only did her health continue to fail, it was expected, and no one ever offered her a non-drug solution. No one wonders why toxins in small doses didn't work.

Now, I see a lot of people in my office who don't like to take meds.  Some won't take pain meds, but still agree to take maintenance meds for chronic systemic problems. So, I am wondering, will there ever be a time when nearly all of the population decides that expensive medications don't work and should be tossed out?

When I hear someone say they are choosing their medications over food, or rent over their medications, I cringe.  Now it has become a weapon to create hate, angst, and disgust against our neighbors.  How can the pharmaceuticals and insurance companies be so cruel?  Really?  Just stop playing their game.

You've been lied to about creating and maintaining health.  For some people it is too late.  They will die prematurely.  I hate it.  I hate it worse than the lies about medications being expensive and people being deprived of poisons.

You think the politicians have the solutions?  Maybe stopping the drugs is a solution.  It is certainly a question worth asking.

(Before you comment and call me ignorant because there are serious diseases that require special drugs like epilepsy or mental illness, you need to consider that most diseases have common causes that are treated successfully  by diet and life style modification.  Even diseases with congenital concerns can likely be treated with minimal medication that should be fairly cheap and not burdened by an expensive patent.)

It is time to give up the twisted game of lies about health and money.

I'm not alone in this:

“One of the biggest tragedies of human civilization is the precedence of chemical therapy over nutrition. It’s a substitution of artificial therapy over nature, of poisons over food, in which we are feeding people poisons trying to correct the reactions of starvation.” — Dr. Royal Lee, 1951

How Do You Truly Thank a Stranger?

Let's face it.  We come across a lot of grumpy people during the course of a day.  They bring you down.  You want to smack them but you refrain.

It's so very nice to deal with friendly people who go the extra mile.

People like that deserve recognition, but how do you it?  A simple, "thank you," seems inadequate.  What are the chances you will see that person again and return the favor?

I am truly grateful for the "Pay It Forward" moments I have encountered with others who have extended me useful favors, in the store, when my vehicle was stuck or broken down, etc.

Thankfully we still have a majority of people who do good looking for nothing in return.

Auto-ships Auto-pay: I Don't Need You So Go Away!

I'm done with auto-ships and auto-pays.  If you aren't sure what I mean, these are ways to pay for products or pay bills on a recurring basis.  The bank or company swipes the money out of your bank on a specified day.

Of course, they only do this with your permission.  But sometimes it's difficult to change or cancel it because you need to call customer service.  Often the customer service representative drags out your phone call and tries to up-sell you to keep you from cancelling.  It's the job, but it annoys me.

Most bills drive me crazy with the incessant marketing to go on auto-pay.  I'm picky about what I put on auto-pay.  And budget billing for the gas/electric company?  No way will I enroll in that.  They don't refund you even when you request a refund.  You could have overpaid for a year and have a nice big credit, but forget trying to get your own money back in your own pocket.  I live in Upstate New York.  My electric bill could be $200 one month and $500 the next.  There is no way I will just let auto-pay take the money out of my bank account.  LOL.

I used to belong to a number of companies that I thought I could make a little extra money in my spare time.  They want you to buy a minimum amount of product on auto-ship to qualify you for commissions.  I tried it.  I've tried to explain how it is such a good idea to potential customers.  I'm tired of that.  Really, if I don't like it, how do I expect prospective customers to like it?  But that is how a commission is manufactured.  It's part of the direct selling formula.  I am burned out on it and I don't do it anymore.  That leaves me out of most online business opportunities.

If I want to pay a bill, I will sign in to my account and click on what bank account to withdraw the funds from myself.  That's it.

Mainstream Madness

Welcome to my attempt to blog.  I decided to buy my own name with a dot-com--address.  Whoa. I really mean it.

I have a business blog.  It's a bit too much business.  How much personal stuff should I put in a business blog when I assume someone is only looking for a problem to solve.  They aren't interested in my favorite recipes or books.  Or maybe......who knows.

I am constantly told to specialize your niche.  Make is specific.  It's not that easy.  I call myself a wellness chiropractor in my business, but usually I just work with what the practice member presents with and offer my wellness services.  They don't all take advantage of the full wellness offerings.  But that's their choice.

So, I was just trying to explain to someone that I can offer someone something that is very different from the mainstream madness in health care.  And then it hit me.  I can blog about interests that are opposite from the mainstream madness.  There are plenty of things in the mainstream I turn away from.  If it's in the news on the loud stations, I don't care about it.  If I read it on a website I respect, then that's another story.

I have been in a sort of news fast lately.  Especially from Facebook.  I still post on my wall and read what other people also post.  But, I scroll on past a lot of things I know will infuriate me or make me wonder why I would waste those five or so minutes reading something very useless, insulting, or likely not even true.

And sometimes I comment and get sucked into a worthless conversation that goes nowhere.  Well, where did I think it would go?  Of course I want everyone to agree with me.  I like the camaraderie.
I really crave the camaraderie.  It's hard to come by.  To find a few good friends who like and follow the same things you believe in is quite a life challenge.

Right now my mainstream madness is centered on the presidential election.  When people are behind one guy or gal, the lies are thrown about.  I can't tell you how offensive a lot of the news stories are.  Well, thank goodness I tell people that we have privacy in the voting booth.

I like to listen to interviews on the radio where a host gives the candidate a a nice length of time to just talk.  Do we really need to see how quickly someone can answer a ludicrous questions in 60 seconds.  And the moderators talk to much.  They present such a litany of minutiae before they ask the question you really can't listen for very long.  Media people love to hear their own voices.  It's really nauseating.  

Health information in the media is mainstream madness, as well.  I'll have to go into this topic in a separate post.  Health care is no longer individualized for each person.  There are standards everyone must meet and specific drugs someone should take if a test indicates it.  This absurdity blows me over the edge.  So the media reports on health issues need to be ignored.  They are short and sweet with no meat.  They are meaningless yet manage to incite fear in people.  

So, take your approach to mainstream madness carefully.  Don't watch, read, or listen to most of it.